Seeking Wisdom in Our Decisions

   Daily we are confronted with choices which require that we make decisions. Some decisions are easy such as what we will choose for lunch-a salad or a cheeseburger? Okay, maybe it's not so easy, but other choices demand a significant amount of prayer, wisdom, and wise counsel. As Christians, how are we instructed to make our decisions? Should our decision-making process look different than that of the world?

    In Luke 14, Jesus makes several bold declarations with regards to discipleship. He explained the cost of being one of his followers in saying, “Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. For which of you, desiring to build a tower does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it?” Jesus ends his teaching by declaring, “So, therefore any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:33). Jesus explains clearly only those who are willing to assess the price and invest all they had into his kingdom were worthy to follow him. He set the cost of discipleship as high as possible and encouraged his hearers to carefully assess the cost of becoming his disciple before declaring their willingness to follow. In following Christ, a disciple forfeits following his impulses to purse the path of his Lord. Jesus made it abundantly clear in Matthew 7:13-14 in describing the narrow gate which is paved with difficulty in contrast to the gate that the world travels which is easy, but always leads to destruction. Jesus’ disciples simply cannot follow Him and the course of this world. There’s a choice to be made.
    

    Many years ago, during a homeschooling lesson with my children, I was teaching the lesson of the narrow and wide paths, and as I drew the two lanes splitting into differing paths on the chalk board, I said, “In your lives you will come to a fork in the road. You will have the opportunity to make decisions and each of those decisions will reflect a choice. One path will lead you to follow the Lord while the other path will take you far from him in the opposite direction following the world.” Looking at the drawing of the two diverging paths, my oldest daughter exclaims, “Mommy, that doesn’t look like a fork in the road, it looks like a Y in the road meaning why would I choose that path?” This was such an impactful lesson that I almost forgot who the teacher was supposed to be! Her deep insight was profoundly practical and is a timeless question which Christ followers should ponder with each decision we make. What is the “Y” (why) behind the path that you are choosing? Which path best follows the Lord and righteous living? What is the wise direction? Which path will hold you accountable in your pursuit of holiness?
     

     It is a grave mistake to believe Christians can follow Christ while also pursuing the things of this world. Christians are called to a much higher standard in the way we think (Romans 12:2) and in the pursuits of this life. Jesus was explicit in saying, “No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money” (Matthew 6:24). Often one of the paths laid before us will entice us to bow down to the god of money promising a path of freedom, but at what cost? Make no mistake, the path is not truly free, it will cost you something. Will it cost you to forfeit your convictions? Will it cost you to lose sight of your first love (Revelation 2:4)? We are foolish to think we are able to make the same decisions and follow the same course for our lives as those who don’t know Christ while achieving a different outcome. Scripture is abundantly clear in warning, “Do not be deceived, bad company corrupts good morals” (1 Corinthians 15:33). Proverbs 13:20 goes on to confirm, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” Our associations are powerful, and they will either have a righteous impact or they will become a corrupting influence.

     As Christians, the way we approach decisions should look different from the world. As Jesus’ disciples, our walk with the Lord and growing in holiness is our number one priority. Everything else is secondary. There are only two things that will last eternally-the Word of God (Isaiah 40:6-8) and the souls of men (Daniel 12:2); therefore, our spiritual life should take precedence over everything else this life has to offer. Jesus exhorted, “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33). Often the choices that lay before us may seem obvious, but let us not forget Solomon’s admonition in saying, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death” (Proverbs 14:12). Remember, the path you choose will teach you many things along the way. Will the path teach you righteousness or death? Will it teach you godly character, morals, and holiness or will it cause you to “exchange the truth of God for a lie?” (Romans 1:25). Will the path offer godly friendships that will seek to hold you accountable, or will you be encouraged to follow your heart? The path you choose has a teacher who is eager to instruct you, so we would be wise to pay close attention to Luke’s warning, “A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher” (Luke 6:40). This is not a statement to take lightly. As you ponder the decisions before you, which teacher will you choose to instruct you? Which path will you choose? What answer will you give when you are faced with the question, “Why did I go that way?” 

Come and See

          

         “Nathanael said to him, ‘Can anything good come out of Nazareth?’ Philip said to him, ‘Come and see.’” John 1:46 (ESV)

           

            My daughter, Gabby, and I recently traveled to Port-au-Prince, Haiti to serve the children at Maison des Enfants de Dieu orphanage with TEEMHaiti. Although traveling overseas to go on mission had been a desire of mine for many years, I must admit, I did not immediately jump at the chance to go when my daughter initially made the request. To be honest, there are two things you should know about me: first, I am a “safety girl.” I am not a risk-taker, and at the time of consideration, the United States travel warning was at the maximum warning level of “Do Not Travel” for the country of Haiti. This was a huge concern for me, especially taking my teenage daughter. My thoughts continually fluctuated between, “Am I acting in wisdom by not going?” or “Am I simply allowing fear to control my decision?” Secondly, I HATE to fly, and I certainly don’t like flying over water! However, once we received my husband’s blessing to go, I knew the Lord was stirring our hearts, and He had called us on mission. To confirm our calling, the Lord blessed us with mission scholarships through our local church which paid for our airfare in its entirety, and friends and family answered our mission letter requesting funds for the trip, and every dollar was provided. In actuality, the trip cost me $140 which paid for luggage filled with supplies for the orphans, but little did I know as I stepped on the plane, it would also cost me my heart.

            As our plane made its descent into Port-au-Prince, I was initially struck by the astounding difference a 2.5 hour flight across the ocean from Florida to Haiti revealed the stark reality of American affluence to Haitian poverty. My first glimpse of Haiti initiated a well-spring of compassion and revealed the truth of my riches. I don’t often think of my middle-class life in America as “rich,” but as my eyes were quick to look around in an attempt to capture everything from the landscape, the houses, and the people, the truth of Isaiah 3:14 (ESV) whispered in my spirit, “…the spoil of the poor is in your houses.”  That would not be the last time I sensed that Scripture in my spirit during the trip.

            After making the drive from the airport to the guest house and quickly dropping our things off in our respective rooms, we piled into the van which would take us the short drive to Maison orphanage. Little did I know as we pulled through the large, metal sliding gate, a piece of my heart would be forever captured and irreversibly changed. As we stepped out of the van, beautiful, giggling children were there to greet us and to vie for our attention. Before I knew it, my hand was grasped by a little girl, and I was welcomed into a sea of smiling, sweet faces. As I settled onto the floor with several laughing children in my lap, my attention was drawn to a cute, slightly older boy wearing a gray hat with cat-type ears who revealed delightful dimples when he smiled although he appeared quite shy. I was struck by the fact he was wearing a hat amidst the Haitian heat, but I was captured by his shy smile. Over the days that followed, I felt drawn to this young boy of only 11 years, and I was impressed by his knowledge of the English language, his ability to read, and his lovable and caring spirit. My sleep throughout the trip was restless as I prayed, cried, and begged the Lord to show me how I could help this particular young boy.

            On my third morning in Haiti, during a conversation with one of our other team members, the Lord whispered in my spirit, “You must fight for him and for all of the children,” and He impressed Exodus 14:14 on my heart which says, “The LORD will fight for you, you have only to be silent.” I quickly wrote this word into my journal and spoke of it to no one. Later that evening, as we were traveling through town, a woman on our team asked, “What does Exodus 14:14 say?” She had seen the Scripture written on a man’s possessions, and although I did not happen to see the Scripture, I knew it was God confirming what he had spoken to me earlier that morning.

            On Sunday morning, our final day in Haiti, I was sitting on the balcony of the guest house enjoying the breeze and praying. I wrote in my prayer journal, “Lord, please stir the hearts of your people, the church, to come and see and to join the fight.” Just a few hours later, Dr. Brian Guenther preached the message the Lord had placed on his heart at church and a portion of his Scripture came from John 1:46 which asks the question, “Can anything good come from Nazareth? Come and see.” These words, come and see, have been whirling through my heart as a call to the church. Come and see what the Lord is doing in Haiti. Come and see the children in the orphanage and fulfill James 1:27. Come and see how the Lord desires to use you to be his hands and feet among the destitute. Come and see how he desires for you to “defend the rights of the poor and needy” (Proverbs 31:9). Come and see how your riches can be used in service for those less fortunate. Come and see a people who passionately love Jesus.

            I do not have all the answers to where God is leading me and my family in the fight for this young boy. I do know the Lord has directed a few first steps which I am attempting to walk by faith and obedience. I came across a quote by missionary, Hudson Taylor, which inspires hope: “I have found that there are three stages in every great work of God; first, it is impossible, then it is difficult, then it is done." I believe God is moving in Haiti, and I believe he stirred my spirit to be part of the ongoing battle for these lives of these children. The words of Pastor David Platt speak passionately and truthfully in saying, “We learned that orphans are easier to ignore before you know their names. They are easier to ignore before you see their faces. It is easier to pretend they’re not real before you hold them in your arms. But once you do, everything changes.”        

The Final Homeschool Chapter...

                   

         As I wrote the final homeschool lesson plan, tears sprang to my eyes and gently rolled down my cheeks. I pulled a worn piece of paper with Deut. 6:4-8, our homeschool mantra, from the 3-ring binder that had been a continuous, yet gentle reminder of this holy calling throughout the years. Over a decade of my life has been lovingly spent on investing in my children’s education and spiritual development. The time has truly passed so quickly! I reminiscence about the nervousness and trepidation I felt upon embarking on the unfamiliar calling to homeschool, and the joy I found in decorating our “school room” with phonetic pictures, a calendar complete with field trip plans, and books, books galore! I cherish the memories of time spent pouring over His Word together, memorizing Scripture, reading adventurous stories aloud, teaching them about the hands on the clock that spiral into time, how to sound out letters which turn themselves into words, adding up the facts in math, learning to sew, playing kickball in the backyard, and raising chickens. Every single memory equals time spent together which is priceless.

            Now, the final chapter of our homeschool journey has been written. My heart grieves for what was. I wish I could have a couple of those days back…to watch baby chicks hatch with my children and to see the joy and excitement on their faces! I would love to listen to them recite a Scripture they had worked diligently on for AWANA and to see the sense of accomplishment on their faces. Oh! To snuggle in the bed one more time with their innocent hearts, little toes, and a Lemony Snickets adventure! I would love to have one more field trip to the zoo, homeschool pajama day, and lunch on the patio in the warm sunshine. But, as the Scriptures say, “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven” (Ecc 3:1 ESV). So, I close the books, cherish the memories, and praise the LORD for the time He graciously gave me to raise my littles. Now, those littles have blossomed into teens with dreams, goals, and abilities to use for the LORD.  I entrust them to the One who loves them far more than I can imagine, knowing the path ahead will have its share of difficulties, but nothing is wasted in the hands of our Redeemer. He will use every situation for their good and His ultimate glory. In this, I trust.

            As God continually leads you, Addy, Gabby, and Manny on new adventures, keep these few things in mind:

1.      God is with you wherever you go (Josh. 1:9), and he hears the quietest of prayers (1 Pet 3:12). Make time to pray each day. Prayer is your lifeline to your Father. Read the Word daily. You need the constant reminder of truth, and it is your weapon in the war (John 17:17, Eph. 6). Don’t leave home unequipped for the battle you will face.

2.      Remember whose you are! You were bought with a price (1 Cor 6:20). The world will tell you that you are worthless, but your Father proved you are priceless. Remember the cross when your value is challenged. The only one who can define you is the one who created you!

3.      In order to have friends, you must show yourself friendly (Pr. 18:24). Choose your friends wisely. Do not allow your good character to be corrupted by bad influences
(1 Cor. 15:33).

4.      You have everything you need in Jesus (2 Pet. 2:3). You don’t need a girlfriend/boyfriend. Remember, there’s a time for everything. Wait for God’s timing. Be okay with being alone for the sake of being kept (for the one God has chosen for you).

5.      Dare to be a Daniel! “But Daniel resolved that he would not defile himself…” (Dan. 1:8)
Stand for what is right in the sight of God, even if no one else is standing with you.
See #1 (God is always with you, so you NEVER stand alone).

6.      Never return evil for evil (Rom. 12:17). You will have an opportunity every day to apply this Scripture! Be a doer of God’s Word, not a hearer only (Js.1:22).

7.      Honor the LORD with your mouth. It will be easy to succumb to speaking the way others speak, but this is not who you are! Encourage others and impart grace with your speech. Your heart is revealed by the way you speak (Matt. 15:18-20). Use your voice to echo the LORD, not our culture.

8.      Respect the authority placed over you (Rom. 13). It is okay to politely disagree, but remember your manners.

9.      Find a way to serve others in some way every day. “…but through love serve one another” (Gal. 5:13).

10.   Above all…honor God. “Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man” (Ecc 12:13). If you resolve to “abstain from every form of evil” (1 Thess. 5:22), it will make your decisions easier!


"I have taught thee in the way of wisdom; I have led thee in right paths" (Pr. 4:11).

I Get To...A Transforming Thought

A couple of weeks ago I read a FB post which relayed the amazing survival story of a local teenage boy who had been in a horrific car accident. By the grace of God, he walked away from the wreck with a few stitches and an amazing testimony! I was reminded of the power of praying parents as well as God’s abounding faithfulness. Not only was this a story of rescue, but there was a liberating spiritual lesson looped into this redemption narrative.

In the mother’s post retelling the events of the accident, she stated that she had recently been reminded of the life-altering notion that we are privileged to “get to” live this life and all that it encompasses, not that we “have to.” The mother went on to share how abundantly thankful she was that she “got to” make her son lunch the day following his accident because she knew the outcome could have been gravely different.

Since reading her post, I’ve applied her lesson and allowed it to alter my thinking over the last couple of weeks. This idea of “get to” rather than “have to” is such a beautiful depiction of transforming our thoughts according to Romans 12:2 (ESV) which instructs, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind.” We must change the way we think before we are able to change the way we behave. Living with a “have to” mentality is negative and depletes our joy in living; however, a “get to” way of life fills us with anticipation and infuses us with joy, especially in the daily tasks we may think are mundane and meaningless. Instead of I “have to” do laundry, think “I get to” do laundry because God has blessed me with a family! Rather than “I have to” make dinner again (that my kids won’t like!), choose instead to think “I get to make dinner because my family will be around the table together.” In place of “I have to go to work/school,” believe that “I get to go to work/school” because God has blessed me with a job and the ability to work or gain an education. These are simple daily adjustments we can make to transform our thoughts which will revolutionize the way we live. Who doesn’t want to live a life filled with gratitude and joy? This is one way we can overcome a negative mindset and begin to really see the graciousness of God in every aspect of our lives.

In a spirit of authenticity, there is one particular area that God convicted me that I need to change with regards to “I get to” and that is the area of prayer. Often I say, “I just have to pray about it,” but truth be told, prayer is a privilege-an invitation to converse with the Spirit of the living God. Prayer is a means of God’s grace to his children, not a life-line of last resort. When God saved us through faith by His grace (Eph 2:8), he bestowed upon us not only the gift of salvation, but the gracious gift of conversation with Him! The writer of Hebrews encourages, “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Friends, we don’t “have to” pray, we “get to pray!” I’ve been reflecting on Ps 138:3 (NASB) which says, “On the day I called, You answered me; You made me bold with strength in my soul.” I love this verse because it’s a great reminder that when we call upon our Lord in prayer, He answers and strengthens our soul. I know we all could use a little soul strength today, so let’s rejoice that we “get to” go to our Heavenly Father in prayer-it’s a privilege!

To the mother who shared her son’s amazing story-I’m sorry you faced such tragedy, but I rejoice with you in God’s protective covering over your son’s life. Often social media gets a bad rap; however, the impact of your FB post has enriched my life and helped transform my thinking, and for that, this mama is thankful.

I dare you to take the “I get to” challenge and transform your thought life! Since we’re entering the hustle and bustle of the holiday season, it is tempting to become stressed with thoughts of “I have to” instead of the grateful notion of “I get to.” Yes, you “get to” go to that Christmas party (with people you may not enjoy)! Rejoice! You “get to” purchase gifts for family and friends which evokes a spirit of generosity that will inspire others! Be grateful “you get to” cook a big dinner with family gathered ‘round your table. Wow! I “get to” exercise after that large Thanksgiving meal! (I know, I know, I lost you with exercise, right?) Capture the thoughts you need to alter in your life and experience the infusion of joy and gratitude because you “get to!”

Don't Take the Bait!

                                                 
                                             

Fishing is not necessarily a sport I enjoy. I find it quite boring, and baiting a hook is less than desirous to me. Thrusting a hook through a wiggling worm simply isn't my cup of tea. But, just as every good fisherman baits his hook hoping to lure in a big catch, Christians are being baited by the enemy as he attempts to lure us away from bearing fruit for Christ. 

It was a normal weekday morning, so our home was bustling with teenage girls getting ready for school, and I was playing short-order cook for their breakfast wishes. Honestly, I cannot recall the exact situation or comment, but someone made a remark that enticed me to respond with an irritated voice and a hint of sarcasm. Before I had time to comment (thankfully), the words, "Don't take the bait," rose up in my spirit. I paused and thought carefully about those 4 words. Every time I'm tempted, whether it be to respond negatively with a critical spirit, erupt with irritation, or react in any manner that is not reflective of my position in Christ, I've been baited and lured in by the enemy.

Bass fishers know one of the secrets to catching bass is to vary the bait depending on the time of year. In the spring, peach- colored patterns are optimal since bass enjoy crawfish, but the summer and fall chrome or silver baits are best since bass like shad (whatever that is-remember I'm not into fishing). You may wonder why I'm telling you about bass bait, but just like a professional angler knows which bait to use during which season to reel in the ideal catch, Satan too knows how to vary his bait to catch us off guard and reel us in. 1 Peter 5:8 (NIV) says, "Be alert and of a sober mind, your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." Our enemy is seeking those he can subtly lure away from their pure devotion to Christ. He desires for us to put our trust in people and things, forgetting our true identity is found in Christ alone. If he can't have our soul, he desires to render us fruitless for the Kingdom. His tactics may be different depending on the season of life you are in. Think about your season right now and where the enemy has baited you in the last week. Strife with a spouse? Anger with a child? Participating in gossip? Foul or abusive language? Impatience? Idolatry? Overspending? Irritability? Pride? Rebellion?

They say it is best to fish right before a storm because the pressure makes the bass more active. As Christians, it is often said we are in 1 of 3 places spiritually:

1. Headed into a storm
2. In the middle of a storm
3. Coming out of a storm

Like the bass, pressure may cause us to be more reactive. The pressure from our storms can often cause us to feel impulsive, defeated, discouraged, weary, and lacking strength. The enemy banks on these feelings to drive us to giving up; however, Christ says, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" (2 Cor 12:9). When I'm at my weakest and feeling defeated, I definitely don't feel like I'm strong at all! The problem is that we cannot rely on our ever-changing, fickle feelings. Our faith is rooted, built, and strengthened on God's unchanging, infallible Word.

Today, when you are tempted to give up or give in, look up (to Jesus) before you give up. And remember-don't take the bait!

The Gospel and Common Core-Does it Really Matter?

     

     Several years ago, Bill Nye (“The Science Guy”), and young-earth creationist, Ken Ham squared off in a debate to answer the question, “Is Creation a Viable Model of Origins”? Regardless of who you believe “won” the debate, the question is just as relevant today as it was then. But, what exactly was being debated? Was it evolution versus creation science? Was it Atheism versus Christianity? In actuality, it was (and still is) a dispute between worldviews. It boils down to a clash between those that accept the plain words of Scripture and those that do not. The basis for a Biblical Creationist’s worldview is the infallibility of God’s Word, whereas Evolutionists and others who hold differing viewpoints base their understanding on fallible, and ever-changing man. 

      My objective here is not to present the two opposing points of view, but rather to discuss the relevance of Christian families maintaining a biblical worldview, and why the implications are high if we don’t hold to the infallibility of God’s eternal Word.
      Unfortunately, it has become common place to see “Christian” denominations succumbing to the pressures of the secular world to be accepting of practices the Bible regards as corrupt behavior. Why are we experiencing such an upheaval in biblical beliefs? I believe one of the primary spheres where Christians have lost their way is education. We are beginning to reap our lack in laying a firm biblical foundation for our children and future generations in souls turning to secular humanism as their basis for life.  As Christian parents, it is our obligation to instill in the next generation the importance of learning to think as God thinks; however, if we are using textbooks that are fundamentally anti-God (which is the stance of the government regulated Common Core curriculum), we would be naïve to expect our kids to walk away with a creation based mindset, God honoring theology, or moral absolutes. Spending 12 years under the tutelage of textbooks instructing as fact an evolutionary basis for creation and a secular humanistic approach to life, children are adopting strongholds of belief which are contrary to God’s Word. Instead, they’re heading into adulthood with beliefs that are solidly and devotedly secular and atheistic. We have no need to wonder why the next generation is fleeing the church, and those that are staying are influencing deviations from God’s Word that  are aligned with the world. It is my concern that many children who are raised in solid Christian homes, who are attending schools whether public or private that are exposing them to a secular humanistic viewpoint devoid of God will graduate and leave their parents homes as secular atheists. Indoctrination is happening right before our eyes. If there is a disconnect between what we say we believe on Sunday (the gospel) and what our children are taught the rest of the week at school, we risk raising youth that look and think no different than the world. According to the Southern Baptist’s Family Advocacy Group, “88% of children raised in evangelical homes leave the church at 18 never to return.”

     Textbooks, such as Common Core, that push a secular/atheistic agenda which deprive children the opportunity to contemplate creationism will have a profound impact on the trajectory of their spiritual lives. Their spiritual resolutions will further impact their decision making process, and ultimately how they choose to live their lives. As parents, it is imperative that we stop and ask the question, “How is my child’s worldview developing?” Education is the primary means of worldview development. We need to think critically about the type of schooling our children are receiving, and the adults providing the instruction. The repercussions for our children’s worldview are weighty. Their worldview will influence what they believe, who they are, what they do, and ultimately, where they spend eternity. Ken Ham asserts, "I want Christians to recognize the importance of allowing Scripture to be the authority in all areas—including history and science. The moral and societal decline we’re seeing across the West is a direct result of man making himself the authority, instead of seeing God’s Word as the authority in all areas. If man makes the rules, then why not redefine marriage, family, and gender? Why not allow anyone to live any way they please? But we are not the ultimate authority—God and his Word are, and we need to allow his Word to shape our thinking and boldly share its truth with our dying culture."
      We cannot compartmentalize our faith in one sphere of our lives and academics in another. In other words, we cannot separate the gospel message from what our children are learning in the classroom. We lose credibility with our children, as well as the watching world, if we preach the gospel message yet extract the Designer from our science and history curriculums. Proverbs 1:7 (NLT) is quick to point out that there is no real knowledge apart from the Creator in saying, “Fear of the LORD is the foundation of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.”  Academic advancement is stalled when education overlooks the presence of God in the world because “all knowledge is His knowledge” (Col 1:16). If we  claim to know Christ and desire to live for him and to train our children as such, it is essential to take seriously the Scriptures that command us  to be transformed by the renewing of our mind to a Biblical mindset and no longer conform to the pattern of the world (Rom 12:2). If we believe there is neutrality in the pursuit of knowledge, we may have already adopted a humanistic mindset.  The Apostle Paul clearly warned Timothy, “See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces of this world rather than on Christ” (Col 2:8 NIV). Does Common Core curriculum really matter? Personally, I think it does. Souls are at stake. However, as Christ’s Bride, we are not without hope! “If my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land” 2 Chron 7:14 (ESV).  Let us thoroughly study the Scriptures for God’s divine direction and pray for a courageous willingness to change course if necessary. 

The Face of Grief

     

     As the first anniversary of my mother’s death is fast approaching, I’ve been reflecting on the moment the phone call came that announced my mother’s arrival in heaven and absence from this earth. It was the moment her hope and joy were finally realized, and I couldn’t help but wonder what it was like-to see Jesus face-to-face. But, at the same time, my heart was a churning mixture of shock, sorrow, and joy. It may seem odd to you that I’d add joy into that concoction, but I was truly joyful knowing that she was no longer suffering, and she was now standing, or perhaps kneeling before the throne of grace. To borrow words from Charles Spurgeon, “However severe the struggle, the victory has been won, the laboring vessel was severely tossed by the waves, but she has now entered into the desired haven.” Her eyes were beholding glory, while my heart was flooded with grief. Grief is a 5 letter word that seems so small and insignificant, but in actuality is quite weighty. What we do in the moments following our impact with grief set the trajectory for our lives in the weeks, months, and years to come. My children watched in their own dismay as I hung up the phone and fell to the floor drowning in tears. With everything in me, I confessed through the sorrow what my mind knew and my heart longed to fully comprehend, “To live is Christ. To die is gain!” (Phil 1:21)  To die.IS.gain. In that moment, my mother gained all she’d ever hoped for. Eternal life was realized as she met her Savior face-to-face.

     After my mother’s funeral, during my quiet time, I found myself turning daily to the book of Psalms. The laments of the Psalmist resonated with my spirit as a soothing balm for my grief-filled soul. During that time, I came across Charles Spurgeon’s sermon entitled, “The Man of Sorrows,” which he delivered in 1853. With his poignant words he writes, “Christ is in all attitudes the consolation of Israel, but He is most so as the man of sorrows. Troubled spirits turn not so much to Bethlehem as to Calvary; they prefer Gethsemane to Nazareth. The afflicted do not so much look for comfort in Christ as He will come a second time in splendor of state, as to Christ as He came the first time, a weary Man, and full of woes. The passion flower yields us the best perfume; the tree of the cross bleeds the most healing balm. Like in this case cures like, for there is no remedy for sorrow beneath the sun like the sorrows of Immanuel. As Aaron’s rod swallowed up all the other rods, so the griefs of Jesus make our griefs disappear. Thus you see that in the black soil of our subject, light is sown for the righteous; light which springs up for those who sit in darkness, and in the region of the shadow of death. Let us go, then, without reluctance to the house of mourning, and commune with “The Chief Mourner,” who above all others could say, “I am the man that has seen affliction.” In one sense I was deeply comforted to know Jesus understood my ensuing grief, but alternatively, Spurgeon’s writing exposed the truth of Isaiah 53:3 NLT which names my Savior “a man of sorrows,” who was acquainted with “deepest grief.” If my Savior was acquainted with grief, so will I be in my pursuit of Christ-likeness. To be “acquainted with” implies personal experience or a familiarization. To be familiar with grief? My first thought was, “No thank you. I’ll pass.” But, the igniting truth is: None of us gets a pass from grief in this life, and grief is the key to intimacy with Christ. Grief is its own type of gift-the gift of intimacy. In my experience, grief can be described as a severe sorrow of piercing mental anguish. It can appear as a never-ending assault on your heart and your mind. Walking through grief can feel as if you’re suffocating, and every step forward is a forced, willful opportunity to evade the darkness and step back into the calmness of light. But, once we experience grief, life is never the same, and I’m not sure that it’s supposed to be. Grief is meant to change us.

     Grief is the protagonist in our salvation story all the way back to the Garden of Eden. It is the antithesis of the deceptive American prosperity gospel. Jesus didn’t promise health, wealth, and flourishing, favorable circumstances in life. In fact, he declared, “In this life you will have tribulation” (John 16:33 KJV). Tribulation can be defined as, “grievous trouble,” or causing grief. If life is smooth sailing, you should probably question who you’re following. The secret is: Intimacy with God happens in the darkest of times, in the brokenness of life, during grieving seasons, and unfavorable conditions. If God is only good when “life is good,” that is shallow faith. Grief is the means by which our faith is conditioned to grow. Grief and brokenness are the well-traveled roads for the authentic Christ follower. They are the roads that will lead to our “happily ever after,” it just won’t be this side of heaven.